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  • Me:This older generation pisses me off so much
  • Therapist:Why?
  • Me:Because when I was growing up, we were forcefed the idea that if we didn't want to be 'flipping burgers at McDonalds,' then we'd better go to college.
  • Therapist:And?
  • Me:And now we've all gone to college, have degrees, can't get a damn job, and the same people that told us to go to college call us entitled assholes because we refuse to flip burgers
  • Therapist:Touche
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fightwing23:

peetababy:

I SWEAR TO GOD THERE IS A GIRL IN MY CLASS WHO CAN READ MY THOUGHTS SHE’S ALWAYS LOOKING AT ME FUNNY WHEN IM THINKING INAPPROPRIATE THINGS SO I SAID IN MY HEAD “START LAUGHING IF YOU CAN HEAR ME” AND SHE STARTED LAUGHING IM SCARED?????

This is either a plot for a new X-Men movie or a Stephen King novel.

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  • 4 days ago
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crabparty:

my brother had a dream he spent 20 dollars on a hotdog and he woke up screaming

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justazombiewithakeyboard:

butcarlthatkillspeople:

sarcastic-snowflake:

just a reminder: we’re two periods away from 2014.

you couldn’t just say months you had to measure time with your menstrual cycle

fUN FACT. the earliest form of a calender that’s ever been found was to keep track of an ancient person’s menstrual cycle. ppl with vaginas invented time. there is a reason that months are about the same length as the time between periods. that is all.

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macklemack:

50 shades of dark circles under my eyes

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dirtylittledamsel:

when you just get out of the shower and your parents don’t tell you they have guests over

image

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elegancea:

Sometimes, the best way to not get your heart broken is to act like you don’t have one. 

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jakemalik:

seeing a hot stranger in public is a blessing

seeing the same hot stranger in public again is a sign

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